Happy Homemaker Monday: July 20, 2026

 I am forever endeavoring to do better here. Two days in a row, which is small potatoes, but a pretty good start. I'm in between farm shifts, as this is the hottest part of the day, so here we go. 

The Weather: It's supposed to reach 80 degrees today, which I realize is nothing compared to, say, Texas, or even my home state of Illinois, but my little mountain heart is no longer cut out for 80 degrees. Gross. Thankfully, it's supposed to cool down to the high 60's by Friday. 

Right now, I am: Resting from farm shift #1, getting ready for farm shift #2. I kicked it off in high gear today, and I am SORE. But it shall all be worth it, I am sure. 

Thinking and pondering: Everything (and everybody) is behind this year. Every farmer I've spoken to is behind in flower production, so I don't feel quite so bad. I'm wondering how much work I have to do tomorrow (it's a lot) and where the heck my small pitchfork went to (it's probably somewhere between flower rows if I know me) 

How I am feeling: Sore, but accomplished and productive, which is a far cry from how I felt last week. 

On the breakfast plate: I had coffee, and a piece of sourdough bread at work. 

On the lunch plate: I went to the deli in town and got a BLT. 

On the dinner plate: Fried eggs, toast, and in-season peaches. I may reheat some soup. At this point, eating is mainly for fuel. It's so hot. 

On the menu: Tonight, we're having eggs and toast. Tomorrow, I"m  making beef stew and rice, and Wednesday is egg roll in a bowl. It's an off week so I'm only planning til Wednesday. I'll plan the rest of the week later. I do have a ham chilling out in my freezer, and will likely cook that and piece it out for things like soup and ham fried rice. 

What I am wearing: my farm uniform: the ratty shorts I've had for years and a t-shirt. 

On my reading pile: "She is a Haunting" and "Don't Go to Sleep". 

We're having a spooky summer here. 

On my TV this week: The girls and I are watching "Project Hail Mary" for Wednesday movie night. I'm also watching "Hell for You" on Netflix...in an attempt to learn some Japanese, I'm watching it without dubbing. Do I know much? Nah, but the Tokyo Revengers movie taught me how to yell "in a row!" which has been an endless source of amusement for me and my kids. 

Looking around the house: Goose is playing with her Barbies (I love that she still enjoys them). Ella is in her room, talking to her best friend (who lives in Ohio) on the phone. Gypsy the black cat is sacked out on the couch in the living room. I should be finishing up this post like NOW so I can make dinner before I have to go back and hit the farm again. 

To do list: Pack up my stuff for my overnight at work/the farm. 

                  Take care of things for my mentor

                 Make dinner before I leave

                Go for a run 

                Mini laundry run at work 

What I am creating: Beautiful gardens. At this point in the year, tis all I can do. 

From the camera: 

My youngest wanted a haircut. A really short haircut. She has curly hair, and it's hard to cut, but I think I've done it justice and she loves it. Also, she got a camera for her birthday and takes it everywhere. I snapped this picture when she came to work with me last week and we took the work dog for a walk. 

Bible Verse, Devotional, Prayers: I mentioned in yesterday's post that besides God, nobody is coming to save me. I need to be praying for my sanity and remember where my obligations actually are (God, my kids, my work). I have no specific verses, but I've been slowly making my way through the book of Proverbs. 

Have a lovely week! 

I'm Terrible At Blogging.

 It's been over a year. 

So much has changed. Ella is 20 (WHAT), and Goose is 9 (DOUBLE WHAT)

I miss my littler corner or the blogosphere. I miss writing, and drawing and taking pictures and living. 

Let me tell you guys, finding out you're being cheated on in your marriage sucks. Letting other people into your life, even on a friend level, then finding out they're completely awful also sucks. Add to it a hurricane, having to become a home-health aide (not really, I'm still a farmer, but my mentor is 93 and so much stuff is dumped off on me) overnight, while keeping up all responsibilities...oof. 

It's been downright depressing, and to be honest, I've been depressed. I was in church today, and the realization was this: other than God, NOBODY IS COMING TO SAVE ME. I have to pray, yes, but I also have to kick myself in the butt and pick myself up. 

For two decades, I made excuses for my daughters' Dad, but the fact is, he is who he is, and I'm done protecting him, on social media and in real life. It is what it is, he is who he is. I have to be better than that, and since I've always been the stability in the girls' lives, it's not that hard. 

But, full disclosure, I had to apologize to my daughters tonight. I haven't been the Mom they've deserved, and that's not okay. I'm adult enough to realize when I have to make amends. Ella, at 20, has always been my stoic and quiet kid, and she just said, "It's not your fault, Mom." Goose, at 9, my wild child, said, "I know I haven't always been the best daughter." 

And guys, I don't deserve these kids. I lucked out so hard. Because when all of this was said and done, we went on the swings and hooted and hollered and played "Cowboy, Take Me Away" and laughed way too much. I had a moment of pure unfiltered JOY on that dumb swing. It's all still out there. It may have gotten lost somewhere between infidelity and emotional abuse and manipulation and just straight up despression, but it's still there. 

And my kids need their Mom. 

At the end of the day, I'm all they've got.