Don't Let the Magic Die

I was lucky enough, or maybe childish enough, to really SEE the magic in everything growing up. Even when it was hard. Even when we were living in an apartment on the third floor in a bigger city than I had ever seen, and plants were few and far between. Even when I didn't understand a word of English. 

I raised my girls in vastly different environments for their first three years. Ella was raised in the same city I had lived in as a girl, only blocks away from that three story apartment building I spent my first American year in. Josie, for all her life, has only known the little brown house in the mountains. Ella could use a fax machine at the age of two. Josie has a much more relaxed upbringing, even though I still work ridiculous hours.

Raising Ella in the city was magical. We used to ride the bus home...and I knew the driver well enough to where she would turn the lights on the bus down, so Ella could crack her glowsticks and giggle. There were so many parks, we would go to a different one every week. Grocery trips to the Mexican market were great, the churro lady always gave us extra samples. 

Raising Josie in the country is magical. Fireflies are our glow sticks, and so are stars. Our backyard is our park...and there are endless hills stretching out before us, ready for exploring. Our town is tiny enough to where everybody at the grocery store knows us, and the lady at the Food Lion always has thin-sliced American cheese for Josie to snack on. 

Somewhere in my 36 plus years of life, I've lost sight of that magic. Life is just hard sometimes. I work a lot, and there's so much more on my plate than there was 10 years ago. I'm carrying so much more grief, so much more work...so much more baggage. 

Josie has begged me to "splash in muddy puddles" (can you tell she likes Peppa Pig?) for days...and so today we went. And she got MUDDY. Like, a bath was imminent muddy. And my dress and shoes were muddy too. But, it was amazing to watch her face. It was wonderful to watch her eyes light up...and yes, it was even wonderful to watch the mud squish between her fingers. Childhood magic is contagious....

I'm trying hard not to let the world get to Ella too much. I know she is growing up and that she is a teenager, but I don't want her to lose her wonder. She came to work with me in the garden on Saturday and we found a ringneck snake in the mulch pile. And honestly, it was the highlight of her day. And mine. 

We also found a clutch of black snake eggs in the mulch pile. 

So...what's a Mom and daughter to do? Take them home, of course. Within the next two months, we should be (foster) parents to a baker's dozen worth of black snakes. 

Did you know that this is what snake eggs look like? I didn't, until Ella told me. 

I'm hoping to keep the magic alive and well in this household for years yet! 

Happy Homemaker Monday: July 27, 2020

Good morning, friends. I'm a bit weepy this morning. I took a drive through the mountains yesterday, and passed Grandpa Bruce's house. Everything came flooding back...and made me miss him. And my Dad. Even though the two men never met each other, they both shaped my life in ways I could never have predicted.

The Weather: Less terrible, more seasonal! Last week, we had some scary thunderstorms, and a few lightning strikes in the county. It was terrifying, but things have thankfully evened out just a little bit, though I'm always keeping an eye out on the hurricane forecast. Hurricanes this far inland are pretty rare, but Grandpa Bruce always told me about when Francis and Ivan swept through in 2007, and caused much damage to the little mountain town.

How I am feeling this morning: Physically pretty good. I took several short mini hikes yesterday and was completely wiped out by the time I got home. All is well now though, after a good night's sleep.

On my mind: It's been 10 years since our family of then-three (Gabe, Ella, and me) arrived in North Carolina with pretty much the clothes on our backs. We knew one person, and I'm thankful for that friendship to this day. I went to work the next day, and somehow made enough money to move out of my friend's house, into our first tiny little North Carolina house. It was scary to start over, so far away from everything and everyone I knew, but it made us all stronger in the end. It's hard to think of Ella as this tiny 4 year old, when now, she's 14, and headstrong, and one of the best people I know. This place is where my husband., by God's grace, beat his alcohol addiction. The place where my dream to become a Mom again was realized, though we've lost a pair of little twins and my only son. Had we never come to North Carolina, I've no doubt that Gabe and I would be divorced. I'm so thankful for our first little NC landlady, Mrs. Marie. She and I had our own little book club the three years we rented from her. The girls and I still visit her, and will visit again when COVID gets lost...Mrs. Marie is elderly and would be terribly vulnerable to this virus. Maybe I'll write her a postcard.

On the breakfast plate: Coffee, with a side of...coffee. Yikes.

On my TV: I haven't watched ANYTHING. Most of my time has been spent in the garden. I'll try to post pictures of it, on another entry I've planned for today.

On the menu this week: 
Monday: Butter Chicken, Rice
Tuesday: Hamburger Casserole
Wednesday: Smothered Pork Stew
Thursday: Greek Chicken and CousCous
Friday: Mississippi Mud Potatoes
Saturday: Jambalaya and Sausage
Sunday: Baked Ziti (It's also my 14th Wedding Anniversary!)

From the Camera: 

My two girls. Born 11 years and 11 days apart, though it certainly was not planned that way. Ella was born 1 year to the day after I lost her big sister. Josie was born 1 year, 1 month, 1 week, and 1 day after I said goodbye to her big brother Thomas. I am so blessed.

Looking around the house: Oof. Needs some TLC, to say the least. My husband's weekends off are rare and cherished, but the house always needs to recover. Chores go by the wayside, and that's okay. I'd rather have that time with Gabe anyway.

Chore I'm not looking forward to: I'm trying to look forward to all the chores, because that means they will be done.

To relax this week, I will: Take myself on a walk through the tiny creekbed that faces Grandpa's house, listen to all of the music that Grandpa was so excited about. Johnny Cash and Merle Haggard. Take Ella and Josie on a picnic at the Riverwalk, so we can look at the bandstand that Grandpa helped to build. Listen to Benjamin Tod's soothing voice and guitar. Watch the sunset from the top of the hill in town.

Something I want to share: 

This man's voice made me burst into tears the first time I heard it. Maybe I am just emotional, I guess.


On my prayer list: 
Everybody and everything. I know that I post that every week, but it is what it is. This country, the world, NEED God.

Happy Homemaker Monday: July 20, 2020

Good morning! It's Monday, all right. Today hasn't started off how I wanted, but I think if I keep a poisitive attitude, I can turn it around! I've already had my coffee, and am headed to work soon.

The weather: It's been HOT, especially for the mountains, which are logically (supposedly) cooler than most. Nope, not so much this year. It has been HAWT.

How I am feeling this morning: Trying not to let little things annoy me, and focus on the good. I've literally had to make a "grateful for" list in my head because otherwise, I'll cry.

On my mind: Work, work, work. More work. But really, it's work and some projects I've gotta get done around the house. I think I'm in the market for a few new dressers. Hmm.

On the breakfast plate: Just coffee right now. Maybe I'll get something else later.

On my reading pile: I just finished "Ghost Song", so I'll be looking for something new to start today.

On my T.V.: Ella and I just got "The Beast" from 1996. It's a movie about a giant squid, but William Petersen is in it and I would watch him read a phone book. So, that's on the schedule for tonight, ha!!!

On the menu this week:
Monday: Sheet Pan Supper with Sausage and Vegetables
Tuesday: Homemade Crunchwraps
Wednesday: Cauliflower Kuku
Thursday: Chicken Cutlets with Garlic Parmesan Noodles
Friday: Pizza Soup
Saturday: Angel Chicken , Rice
Sunday: Crockpot Lasagna

From the Camera: 

Ella and the giant zucchini from this weekend (I'd cut the top off and it was STILL a giant)

Looking around the house: The girls are relaxing. I'm pretty sure Ella is surfing Pinterest, she is 100 percent my kid, haha!!! Renfield the giant white cat is asleep on the TV. Gabe has already left for work.

Chore I'm not looking forward to: Can I lump work under "chores" today? I'd really love to stay home and rest, but it's not happening. But...all the same, I'm grateful I have a job, especially in these times.

To relax this week, I will: Take the girls to hike to the watershed. Ella and I haven't gone in years, and Josie has never been there. There's a little sandy inlet and the calmest water you ever saw, with lots of little fish swimming around. And so many blackberries, which will be coming ripe soon.

Something I want to share: Complete randomness, BUT.
Cats don't sweat. It's why they groom more when it is hot. I'm 36 and I just learned that yesterday.

On my prayer list: 
This country. This whole entire world, and all of the people in it. Social media is such a dangerous and ugly place lately.

Try and have a beautiful week, friends!

Happy Homemaker Monday: July 13, 2020

Good morning, my friends. It's Monday...again. The weeks are just whipping by, and I'm kind of glad. I would be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to the end of this insane year.

The weather: At this moment, at 9:01 a.m. Eastern time, it's pretty much perfect. Give it a few hours and it will be too hot for me, but prime river weather for my girls.

How I am feeling this morning: Refreshed. Yesterday was restful and good, and so today, I am ready to face the week.

On my mind this morning: I have to take the work dog to the vet on Thursday, and given the fact that he weighs 165 pounds, it's going to be an undertaking. I'm also thinking about a home decor project that Ella and I will be attempting, and wondering what to put in the raised bed that we were just gifted by our favorite neighbor.

On the breakfast plate:  A cup of coffee and a side of Alan Jackson singing "Just as I am." Eventually, I'll eat. I think.

On my reading pile: I just finished "Wall of Silence" by Tracy Buchanan...and it was GOOOOD. I started on "Ghost Song" by Mark L'Estrange Saturday, but I haven't gotten into it yet. Kindle Unlimited is completely worth it!!

On my TV: Ella and I are rewatching Degrassi TNG from the beginning...again. Also, we're yet to pick a lame Lifetime movie for this week, although "Pretty Little Addict" and "My Evil Stepdad" are front runners. We tend to pick them by which ones have the most ridiculous movie stills on Lifetime Movie Club (Well worth the subscription fee, haha!!)

On the menu this week: 
Monday: Chicken and Couscous, veggies
Tuesday: Pork Chops in Mustard Sauce, Mashed Potatoes
Wednesday: Cabbage Roll Skillet
Thursday: Pork Stew, Roasted Potatoes
Friday: Zucchini Boats
Saturday: Soup and Sandwiches
Sunday: Chicken Spaghetti

From the camera: 

Yesterday, on my way home after work, a butterfly hitched a ride on my shoulder, and wouldn't leave so I brought it home for a short time. It took a liking to my husband!!

Looking around the house: It's clean. Very very clean. Ella and I busted butt organizing my kitchen shelves and it paid off. She also took initiative and vacuumed. Josie has her dollhouse open. The fan is going. Gabe and Ella are still sleeping, but Gabe should be up soon to get ready for work. 

Chore I'm not looking forward to this week: Not a fan of cleaning the fish tank, but it will be worth it. We have one very awkwardly shaped tank for one very picky Koi Betta fish named Greg Sanders (CSI, haha!). 

To relax this week, I will: Take walks in the wildflowers fields on breaks at work, take the big blanket and lay it down in the side yard and watch the stars with the girls. Draw luna moths. Drink my morning coffee when the kitchen is bathed in brilliant light, watch the sunset from my porch swing. Arrange chicory and queen anne's lace in the silver pitcher my boss gifted me with a few years back. 

Something I want to share: I had a blip of wanting to say something about this yesterday, and I'm going to post it here. Once you put a situation in the open, you can start dealing with it better. My life was turned completely upside down in March due to a situation with my husband. It knocked me on my butt, and I contemplated divorce. 

He apologized profusely. 

I've prayed about it. 

(The situation involved him being stupid with a co-worker of his, who was pretending to be a friend to me. It all blew up one night, and I've been dealing with it since. No, there was no physical affair) 

Gabe and I are slowly finding a new normal. Through my prayers, I've discovered I don't WANT to throw out 15 years of committment. He doesn't either. 

This situation kicked my butt. Knocked my weight loss off kilter. Threw me into a depression. I've spent more time than I want to admit crying, or angry, or both. 

And while my husband was way wrong for what he did, the girl in question was wrong too. He knew he was married, but so did she. 

He admitted what he did. He owned it. She doesn't see anything wrong with her role in the situation. And she honestly doesn't deserve a role in our lives anymore, in any capacity. 

Ooof. I didn't think I would write all of that out there. 

But since I have, here's the thing. God made marriage to be resillient. Yes, there are things that can and should end a marriage (abuse, etc)...but things like this...they can be recovered from. And my marriage will recover. 

On my prayer list: 

This country. It's in a mess. The state of Florida, and my sister's family, who resides there. She's pretty freaked out by their COVID numbers, and truthfully, so am I. 

Have a beautiful week. 

In the Kitchen: Tomato Pie...uh...Tart?

Okay, so full disclosure. This did NOT look like the Tomato Pie that I looked at here even though I followed the directions. 

It's no secret that pie crust and I are not friends and never have been, but I had high hopes. That said, it tasted delicious. So delicious that my tomato hatin' husband ate three helpings. 

Here we go. 

What You Need: 

*Store Bought Pie Crust

*Tomatoes (I had 4 or 5 Romas)

*Basil (I just ripped a bunch of leaves off one of my giant garden plants)

*Chopped Onion (1/3 of a cup? I don't know) 

*Salt

*Pepper

*Mayo

*Shredded Cheese (the recipe called for Grueyere, but I used Fiesta blend, sue me) 

What You Do:

1) Pre-bake your crust, according to the directions on the box, then make sure your oven is at 350

2) Chop up your tomatoes and onion and basil

3) Salt and pepper your tomatoes and put them in a colander, over a container (I threw the onions and basil in there too, cause why not?). Mash them down with a potato masher to draw out the moisture

4) Put your (hopefully drier) tomatoes in the pie crust shell (side note: mine looks terrible. Pie crusts and I are not friends, whatcha gonna do.

5) Combine your half-cup (or cup, or whatever) of mayo and your cheese. Spread that over your tomato mixture

6) Bake at 350 until bubbly and golden brown 

(25-45 minutes) 

So, it doesn't look all that great. But, man. It was delicious. If you're better at pie crust than I am (and let's face it, you probably are), yours will probably look amazing. :) 

What We've Been Up To

Life's been wild lately.
How wild can it be in quarantine, one may ask.
Well...when you have a teenager and a toddler and a bunch of cats and animals at work (I'm essential!), the answer is "pretty wild."

Yesterday, was the second anniversary of my Dad's passing and it was hard. Everything surrounding his death is hard. Growing up, I honestly didn't think I would ever BE without Dad, once I met him and everything. So, for him to not only be gone, but to be gone for two whole years is unimaginable. And yet, here we are.

I'm trying to do more of what Dad wanted me to do. He was forever on me about "taking time for me" (a foreign concept, since I'm a workaholic, and essential) and taking care of myself.
Over the last year, I've lost a lot of weight, and am trying to lose more (trust me, I needed to lose it), but I'm trying to take more time for myself. Taking hikes, picking flowers, wandering around the hills with my camera for an hour if I have one to spare.

We live in a beautiful place, although I am often homesick. I've found that the state of TN is my second home, even though I live in North Carolina. Over the last two months especially, most of my hiking and adventuring is done in TN.

My little garden is doing well, and it's really been a stress reliever for me.

This is the first year that Josie actually understands a garden, and it's been pretty amazing to see how interested she is in all of the plants that we're growing this year.
Also, I've lived in this house for FIVE YEARS (that's right FIVE) and I just discovered how GOOD my back deck is for growing produce. Whomp Whomp. Gardening fail.

We're also attempting to grow "fairy carrots". (Carrots in a jar. In a confined space, carrots will grow tiny.) I found a packet of carrot seeds and a jar, and honestly, I'm not holding out much hope (because I'm not entirely sure how old that seed packet actually is). But I'm documenting it for the blog-verse here.

I'm trying to be better with doing update posts instead of just a Monday post (which I missed this week, for obvious reasons) and random recipes (but one of those is coming soon!)